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DoubleX Music Room

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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 58th published song:
DoubleX - Reflective Solitude(Mental Pain Relief)
Current version: 1st(1 Jan 2026)
When you're seriously hurt and suffering from severe losses, choosing either "reaching out for external connections and helps" or "consciously digesting the pains alone" can be okay for you. While sometimes your hearts want to open your wounds in front of your deeply trusted ones, there will be times your bodies will want to have a reflective solitude, and both are just natural needs during the healing processes, as long as you can maintain your awareness thorough the journey :)
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 59th published song:
DoubleX - Deeply Touched(Mental Pain Relief)
Current version: 1st(4 Jan 2026)
When so many people offer so much so needed help so effectively, it'd only be natural for many of these victims of the disasters, the helpers and those just witnessing all this to be so deeply touched by all the benevolence that they'll really want such altruism to become the norm of the rest of their lives :)
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 60th published song:
DoubleX - Unbreakable Vicious Circle
Current version: 1st(11 Jan 2026)
When every part of your lives become worse and worse but you can't stop your contaminated cores from further rotting, it means you're in an unbreakable vicious circle, so all you can do is to witness how you'll eventually fail to hold your corrupt selves together :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 61st published song:
DoubleX - Point Of No Return
Current version: 1st(16 Jan 2026)
For almost everyone ever existed, life itself will eventually reach a point of no return. For some it's almost certain that the path will lead to heaven, for some others it's most likely going straight to hell, and for the rest the destination can be a total unknown. But the common ground is that nearly no one can go back even slightly after this, or the results will be much worse for basically everyone involved. So roughly speaking, all one can do is to continue to walk through all these til the end, regardless of what has happened and what will occur :)
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 62nd published song:
DoubleX - Completely Ruined
Current version: 1st(25 Jan 2026)
Just when it's about to succeed, it suddenly becomes completely ruined; Just when you think something's nearly finished, it turns out to be completely ruined long ago without you knowing; Just when you feel close to someone you deeply trust, all of a sudden you're completely ruined by that someone; When more and more parts of your lives are completely ruined, you may as well just let everything about you to go completely ruined as well :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 63rd published song:
DoubleX - Enjoying Suffering
Current version: 1st(4 Feb 2026)
While many think that both the heaven and hell are very far away from the existing civilization, they're actually both within the mankind all along. Those lucky enough to keep enjoying suffering while spreading its positive meanings to the world are already living in the heaven right here and now; Those unlucky enough to keep trying to escape and resist suffering while cursing any apparent cause are already living hellish lives that are much worse than even the worst death. Just as Sisyphus can never run from his fate but can always change how he understand and face it, nobody can skip any deep and immense suffering inherent to all human beings but we can all learn to painfully enjoy them in altruistic and sustainable ways :)
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 64th, 65th, 66th and 67th published songs:
DoubleX - Letting Everybody Down
Current version: 1st(8 Feb 2026)
When I'm too unable to finish anything, I'll be just letting everybody down no matter what I do or not do, and I can't just claim that it's at least partly their lessons to learn to deal with disappointment, so sometimes being so incompetent is already an unforgivable sin in itself :(

DoubleX - Beautiful Sorrow
Current version: 1st(8 Feb 2026)
Usually most people mostly avoid all kinds of sadness, but for those who can keep peacefully facing the deep wounds of others and themselves, what they experience can become a beautiful sorrow, as long as they're neither deflecting their pains to the others nor holding those of the others on their own :)

DoubleX - Fallen Apart
Current version: 1st(8 Feb 2026)
If you've to hold something together but it's meant to be fallen apart, you can only slowly watch how it's gradually torn into shreds until you can't even find any last bit of pieces remaining. Although we all know we shouldn't cry for split milk, sometimes we'll still suffer so immensely that we just can't stop crying so painfully X(

DoubleX - Doomed Destiny
Current version: 1st(8 Feb 2026)
As the mankind needs to develop AI to counter the increasing number of elderly and decreasing number of newborn under the dying global economy, the technologically advanced nations are forced to join the AI arms race until it can mostly replace most human jobs most of the time.
But then the 1% elites controlling those AI will treat the rest of the 99% as liabilities wasting resources rather than assets running the societies, so those 1% will use AI to gradually squeeze the living space and resources available to those 99% while forcing them to slowly rely more and more on those AI, causing those 99% to have no choice but to fight each other more and more violently for survival, thus decaying their already miserable world to be a hell and their already painful lives to become nightmares.
While more and more people realize this will likely be the future of the mankind before they naturally die, it's a doomed destiny that even those 1% elites can't stop it, or they'll soon have no place in the inevitable AI arms races :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 68th published song:
DoubleX - Rotten To The Core
Current version: 1st(13 Feb 2026)
As we're told to need to keep tangibly improving ourselves hard to barely stay relevant in this world, we always feel an immensely forced urge to become externally better quickly, even at the expense of mentally harming our internal selves deeply, until we seem to be highly successful on the surface but are actually rotten to the core without anyone knowing, and we won't recognize who we are anymore :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 69th published song:
DoubleX - Forsaken Roots
Current version: 1st(22 Feb 2026)
While it's natural to treat our cities of birth as our eternal roots, when they start dying slowly for decades and all we can do is to watch them gradually burn into ashes, it's only understandable for us to move to new homes and leave those forsaken roots behind :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 71st, 72nd and 73rd published songs:
DoubleX - Sorry For Existing
Current version: 1st(26 Feb 2026)
They feel sorry for consuming food and water, they feel sorry for taking in oxygen and emitting carbon dioxide, they feel sorry for accidentally triggering Amygdala Hijack of even the most mentally unpredictable and unstable ones, and they feel sorry for saying sorry as well as not saying sorry...
In short, they feel sorry for existing and trying to cease existing, it's as if they forced their parents to be parents and especially THEIR parents, and it's as if they should've undone all the "harm" unknowingly done by them, as well as given hefty compensations for all those so-called wrongdoings :(

DoubleX - Permanent Shame
Current version: 1st(27 Feb 2026)
Some aren't just ashamed of what they've done, but also of their very existence, and no amount of behavioral redemption can really relief such shame. Trying to let go of permanent shame by correcting the surface of oneself is like subtracting infinity by many large yet still finite numbers, and the end result will still be unending shame within your core X(

DoubleX - Excessive Emergencies
Current version: 1st(1 Mar 2026)
While we all know that we've to sharpen the axe if we want to raise our long-term throughput, it's very often that, just when we're about to have time to do so, you'll be urgently ordered to immediately cut another tree using that already dull axe, and these excessive emergencies will keep the crunch mode on steroids, especially when the organizations seem to be "always" on the edge of collapse :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 74th and 75th published songs:
DoubleX - Irrevocable Tragedy
Current version: 1st(3 Mar 2026)
They feel that they've almost lost everything and they can't find any way to ever come back, so they think that it's such an irrevocable tragedy that their lives already have no hope, then it's only natural for them to keep sobbing in agony while passively waiting for all this to end badly :(
P.S.: It's the 4th of my published music that can make me weep slightly for at least a short time :)

DoubleX - Unstoppable Weeping
Current version: 1st(4 Mar 2026)
There can be times where almost no one will even try to understand you a bit, and they'll instead find fault with you no matter what you do or not do, but you still wanna be at least slightly compatible with them, so you just accept their criticism and become ashamed of yourselves. Now all you'll have is unstoppable weeping when you're alone, until you've no tears left to cry and feel that your very existence are already too much :(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 76th, 77th and 78th published songs:
DoubleX - Want To Be Forgotten
Current version: 1st(5 Mar 2026)
For some, they're so afraid of being forgotten that they'd rather risk their lives if they think that it's the only way for them to be remembered; But for some others, they want to be forgotten so much that they feel that they should had never existed X(

DoubleX - Fake Success
Current version: 1st(6 Mar 2026)
For those who wants to be successful even at the cost of everything else, even a fake success is still much better than nothing, so they don't care whether such a life is what they truly want, or if the others really believe in their well-forged personal image, as long as things still appear to work the way they seem to desire, until they can no longer lie to anyone including themselves :(

DoubleX - Crippling Stagnation
Current version: 1st(7 Mar 2026)
As you're the only source of income for your parents, those of your spouse as well as your kids, you feel obliged to provide for them all until you retire, so you feel trapped into your toxic yet well-paid job that's totally against your values, and you know that this crippling stagnation will eventually kill your soul by thousand cuts accumulated for years, so all you can do is to powerlessly watch your heart being slowly teared apart by ever increasing tensions built day by day X(
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 79th published song:
DoubleX - Devoid Of Expectations
Current version: 1st(14 Mar 2026)
Since the only one you can directly control is yourself, you won't be able to force anyone else to do anything, so you'll have no choice but to be devoid of expectations towards the others, and all you can do is to treat your request of their help as lottery tickets(their fees, probabilities and rewards depends on the request contents and targets), meaning that any fulfilled ones are just bonus and nothing else should be taken for granted :)
 
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DoubleX

Adventurer
Xy$
1.65
I just made my 80th published song:
DoubleX - Self-Objectification
Current version: 1st(16 Mar 2026)
As human needs societies to survive and societies need human to keep running, it's nearly impossible for the majority to contribute to the societies their ways(or it'd mean always perfect matches of role demands and passion/talent supplies), hence many of them will be forced to do what they don't want, and self-objectification will be the only mean to keep all this sustainable, so the societies can still hold themselves together :(
 
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